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I'm so Stressed out, What am I doing wrong? 10 real life tips to make it easier.

The war of stress and succeeding
A warrior in the world
Stress as we often know it. is the internal 'war' of opposing desires and expectations.

Usually; - the expectations or ambitions we have for ourselves, as opposed to those same demands 'society' has for us.

Society as such, considers itself more important than me and you, and attempts to influence you through manipulation in the form of advertising, whether it be with TV shows behaviorally, or directly with advertisements saying 'borrow this money from us now to feel better, or buy this now to feel better.'

Sadly, if they cannot influence you, they do influence your surrounding human co-inhabitants of life - (who will not be on the same path towards success as you.)

By you recognizing stress within yourself - you must for a start congratulate yourself for being so aware, then begin to ease the biochemical toxins it is creating within you, as you work on plans for the life you desire for your self.

To help you manage stress; begin to think of your body as a machine with a good supply of energy which needs regular care, and maintenance to function well.


With that in mind here are 10 simple tips:


1. Be conscious of your food intake. Limit the chocolate, the flour/sugar/fat combinations (biscuits, cakes, crackers, breads etc). Reduce your white rice, noodle, or packeted foods. Start to learn what a balanced nutritious diet is, and support your physique with regularly spaced eating times.

2. Sleep when stressed is either an escape or seems like a waste of time. Change your thinking a little.
Treat, and think of sleep as a chance to refresh your physical body - to repair the cells if you like.
Establish somewhere safe to sleep, keep it and your bedding clean - without residual chemical odours, and try for fresh air, if you are able and it is safe leave a skylight or window open - locked, and consider sleeping in a space with growing non-allergenic plants.
Turn the TV, radio off - no subliminal all night tapes, if you need a light on, put it several meters or yards away - low down.
Be a little comfortable, warm, and clean if you can as well.
Do sleep away from power lines, and cables, and radio antennas.

3. Engage in regular light to moderate exercise, even walking round in a specified number of circles in your flat or house is a start. A daily 1 mile or 1km walk if safe is even better - can you walk partway to work?

4. Set a priority or two in your daily tasks and concentrate on essentials for you, as well as obviously working for your boss or controller authority -  rather than feeling that you have to do every single thing.

5. There are 24 hours in our day, and you are allowed to work as long as you like, or engage an assistant. Think outside the 'normal' pattern.

6. If a task seems too hard, or too big, break it down into small steps or small goals and focus on achieving the first step or goal before moving on to the next one. (Do the thinking and acting privately, and announce your results and the important part they play in the organizations goals publicly.)

7. Take some time each day, and a special time once a week to relax. The daily time will be better for you if it is some meditation - not TV, magazines, or pub or bar time.
The Christian's have it partly right with the sabbath - it is meant as your duty day to the church establishment, and a specific indoctrination (schooling) time. But - you now think of it as your day to engage in your rest, planning, hobbies, self care etc.

8. Remember the biochemical idea, medically it is very accurate; - so lay off the coffee, alcohol, nicotine, THC, or other drugs, whether they are to relax or stimulate you. Develop a new pattern of only three drinks a night for example, then two drinks next week, then one drink, then one a week.
You will find some new and supportive friends with this thinking, and free up money and time to make the situation easier.

9. Be careful who you listen to, they all have their own desires. agendas, and issues, - often it is better to select parts of each person's ideas, than their whole philosophy. Government agencies, or employees, are not there to help you, government funded ones may give you a better (50/50) chance of success.

10. Hide some resources away privately and safely - if it is money, make sure it is tax paid, and you hide two or three copies of the receipts in two or three different places and/or upload them somewhere private and safe - say DriveHQ - (the employees of the revenue office will falsify the truth at any chance they have). Grow even a little of of your own food, even one herb plant is a good start.
Make sure only you know, this will give you a sense of power and control over your life, and relieve the stress.



Some recommended links to start you on your easier life..... 



  Buy Roy Sheppards book - "..Be The One", and read it, and start to work at it




Live Tarot readers - to find a new direction - for you today.


Creative Visualization, Manifesting, Guided Meditation, Self Hypnosis, Improving your Intuition  






Morgana Rae & Charmed Life Coaching, Inc.
http://morgana.ontraport.net/t?orid=89405&opid=56
Make money by putting LOVE first and Unlock the flow of wealth into your life...



Become the best you can be with Mindmint Become the best you can be with Mindmint







Become Self Assertive, and more a Confident you, from today with -







Assertiveness training, stress handling techniques by the world famous David Bonham-Carter.






Plan your next escape ; - you choose where to - with Webjet.

 

*If your situation is unsafe/or may be unsafe - get local trusted registered professional advice from more than two unrelated identities.see important note. 

You need help with your relationship – but what if ?...The advice lottery

A successful relationship or help with your relationship?
A successful relationship?

Signs of Good Relationship Advice


You need help with your relationship – but what if you get bad relationship advice?


These 10 signs of good
relationship advice will help you know if you’re getting help that will actually improve or save your relationship.

 

How to Recognize Good Relationship Advice


1. Your family is giving you relationship advice for their own reasons
You must be very specific, in asking why;- several times in fact.
Adult children, have there own exploration in life to undertake, and are mostly not to be listened to, after the first meeting of your partner.


2. Your friends are jealous of your relationship
Friends, are usually a great help with first assessments, past that time or those few minutes, they are either afraid of losing you, jealous of what you have and they can not, or deceptive in their intent.
Especially if they are damaged children, or the like.

Numbers 1 and 2 and closely enmeshed, do pay attention to your own life path as well.

3. The advice giver is objective – a sign of good relationship advice
 Listen for subjective statements - name calling - the adviser has their own unresolved immaturity to get through - their advice will NOT help you. 

4. Your inner feelings are telling you this is good or bad relationship advice
  Whether it is right or wrong, it is right or wrong for you just now.

5. You know yourself – a super way to recognize good versus bad relationship advice
As in number 4, take some time out in solitude, meditate if necessary.

6. The advice giver has the full picture of your relationship – the good, the bad, and the ugly
No matter if you are some at fault, an answer given with half the information gives poor results.

7. The advice giver has given you good relationship advice in the past
Did you listen the first time? Possibly this adviser has skills you can learn from.

8. The advice giver has healthy, good relationships
They are able to prove what they say works - if they cannot - keep your distance.

9. The relationship advice is from a good resource
Hard to say what is good, yet if it fits all the other characteristics here it probably is.

10. The relationship advice is honest and unbiased
They take into account both sides, without pity, or judgement.
Who is paying them?, and what rewards do they hope to get from this interaction?
Questions you must ask to avoid bad advice, predators, lawyers, corrupt and greedy people, and cults.

If it is government or lottery funded, their task is to add you to their numbers, and the quality of the help may be either good or bad - do treat it as an emergency 'band-aid' to use and move on without, as quickly as you can.



Some recommended links to start you on your better life..... 



  Buy Roy Sheppards book - "..Be The One", and read it, and start to work at it




Live Tarot readers - to find a new direction - for you today.


Creative Visualization, Manifesting, Guided Meditation, Self Hypnosis, Improving your Intuition  






Morgana Rae & Charmed Life Coaching, Inc.
http://morgana.ontraport.net/t?orid=89405&opid=56
Make money by putting LOVE first and Unlock the flow of wealth into your life...



 Want to still get your ex back - Oprah's relationship specialist has the answers for you



Become the best you can be with Mindmint Become the best you can be with Mindmint







Become Self Assertive, and more a Confident you, from today with -







Assertiveness training, stress handling techniques by the world famous David Bonham-Carter.






Plan your next escape ; - you choose where to - with Webjet.

 

*If your situation is unsafe/or may be unsafe - get local trusted registered professional advice from more than two unrelated identities.see important note. 

This was a Good Relationship, Is it Finished? I am Feeling like it is Over.

Thinking is it over,the relationship?
Thinking is it over?

A relationship, or even a marriage may indeed at times feel like it is better being ended. 

 

Now you chose to be in it or take it on originally - do re-think why you allowed, encouraged, or planned it to start.

 

Or are you going through some of the typical phases of a long-term, committed partnership?


Sometimes counseling with a realistic professional is all that is needed to re-establish the path of mutual success.

Just because you’re struggling with problems in your relationship, doesn’t always mean your partnership is un-saveable, or headed for a divorce court.
(Which will only drain you, and enrich some would say corrupt lawyers and crooked judges - or is it the other way around?)


The following signs may indicate the end of all, or only one stage of your partnership.


 9 Signs Your Relationship is Over ??



1) Your partner can’t see the reality of you being together 

 

If your partner doesn’t understand how his or her actions are affecting you – and even worse, refuses to chat about it, and attempt a few changes (with your positive encouragement) – then your relationship or marriage will be a challenge to rebuild. It may be worth re-evaluating your life habits, and choices at a distance, while you learn new skills for you.


2) Your partner sees how things are, but doesn’t show they care

 

You can communicate with all of your current skills, but if your partner doesn’t care how you feel or whether the relationship is healthy, then perhaps it’s a sign it is best to start over. The habits you have created, and the responses they bring on, will take effort to change. When a non-caring is exhibited, there is usually an underlying issue, that is being protected or defended. Are you prepared to address what is most likely a major problem you are part of?


3) You don’t connect with your partner

 

When you first got together, you probably felt understood, heard, and connected with your partner. As time goes on, and the influences of 'friends,' family, the issues of daily life, money and possibly a house, children, or careers all take a toll…and you find that you each have a preferred way of dealing with society's stressors. The mutual decision making is not so together anymore.


4) You have different visions of the future of your life together.

 

She wants a four million dollar home at the seaside, with all her girlfriend's visiting for drinks: and he wants to live in a rustic cabin on a ranch in the country. She wants six children, many grandchildren, and their hanger ons- of course all funded by?? and he’d rather travel and be child-free for a reasonable while.
She wants her mom, aunt, and cousins to live with you in the family home; you can barely tolerate the gossip at thanksgiving or Christmas.
To succeed you do need to agree on your vision as a couple or family – and consider your plan or life together first (and other influences/influencers second).


5) You’re not physically intimate (if this is important it is over)

 

If you have no love life anymore, to speak of, then you probably aren’t connecting on an intimate emotional and physical level.
There may be power and control issues going on - sadly if someone is in an immature state of mind to do this - just leave- quickly, and quietly. It is a form of abuse, and control, made famous by the KGB- so you are being played, and it is likely your partner is ending the relationship, by a manipulation.


6) You fight the “wrong” way in your partnership

 

If you can’t focus on the topic of your argument, choosing instead to bring up past mistakes or reopen old wounds, then you need to learn different skills away from this relationship. The more past conflicts come into current arguments, the less healthy your approach is.
This may not be a certain sign your partnership is over, but if you keep acting like this, the other person will revert their behaviour to what you keep talking about.

Propose good, you'll get good; threaten, or remind of unwanted past events - you won't get good at all.



7) Your partner cheats and wants to end the relationship/marriage

 

Many couples survive unarranged infidelity, and may end up with a stronger bond because of it. Other couples split up right away, as it was a sign of the other failings in the relationship or people. It’s how the partners approach the solution, that determines if they’ll stay together.



8) Your partner allows their past to intrude.

 

Ex-husbands, ex-wives, or ex's at all. Adult brat children. The list goes on; what partnership is this really, when they have not indeed separated themselves, and offered some commitment to the present.
Unless you want a triage or similar for yourself, leave and find a more mature partner.


9) You or your partner is abusive

 

If your actions are causing a response you don't like, change them. If it goes on for a week or two after this, there is something your partner is trying to control in you.

Look at yourself realistically on a day away from them or the situation.

Many women for example, are abrasive or verbally threatening in their responses to a perceived wrongdoing - and then question the reactions.
Many men for example, promise too much, and life gets in the way.
Time out, on site, or away from each other  - can give you each a chance to determine the next move.




Some recommended links to start you on your better life..... 



Buy Roy Sheppards book - "..Be The One", and read it, and start to work at it





Grow yourself online in the privacy of your own home



Live Tarot readers - to find a new direction - for you today.

 Want to still get your ex back - Oprah's relationship specialist has the answers for you



Plan your next escape ; - you choose where to - with Webjet.

 

*If your situation is unsafe/or may be unsafe - get local trusted registered professional advice from more than two unrelated identities.see important note. 


  pic courtesy pixabay

24 Ways To Be Attractive to Women, Aren't they just a parasite? or are they of value?

Attractive  Women, Aren't they just a parasite? or are they of value?
Attractive and knowing it.
Firstly ask yourself some questions;

1; Will you tolerate the existence of a parasite in your life?

2; How long can you handle supporting this parasite and their hosts?

3; Have you, or are you developing the strength to protect yourself?

4; What parts of your life, and your dreams are you willing to give up?

5; Are the rewards worth it? How can you make them worth it?

*****

90 % of western woman, particularly UK, US, AU, and NZ, and to a degree Scandinavian, and Canadian - have been brought up on the Hollywood fairy-tales of old, or the X-factor of today. 

(Sadly, the eastern Europe, Russian, and Asian beauties are heading this way too- their advantage, is there have been less generations exposed to the propaganda.)

These have shown these woman, their mothers with unlived lives, and their friends - that to look shiny - without any real contribution gets you picked from the crowd - to a life of eternal bliss and recognition. All at of course, other peoples cost and effort.


So this is the market you may have to choose from, Now either-

1; Move cultures and countries,
 (If you can find somewhere untouched by Hollywood - your chances will be better--possibly Mars, or even the Moon.)

2; Use the 90% as practice for the rare 10% - ensuring you have had a vasectomy, and avoid all the other traps they will try to use.
NB the 10% are often disguised, they definitely won't be blonde or coloured hair, employed by any part of government, or a horse rider.
All indicators of an easily duped, needy or dependent emotional manipulator.

3;Avoid all women, or men in that thinking zone

4;Accept the market situation, and show yourself in your best light to get some rewards, protecting yourself and your future.

*****

Numbers 2 and 4 being close to most peoples reality - read below.

These new qualities will give you the edge, to succeed. 
Read through and study them all, then take one a week, and start on it, and keep going to build  an amazing life.



1) Look Tall – Hold your posture well. Women want to look up to a man, literally and figuratively.

Learn Reiki, or the Alexander technique. Yoga is good - an older male teacher is best to get you started.
The woman or ego filled young 'male' will try to emasculate you sooner or later - keep them aware of where the money is coming from, and/or take what you have learnt and do it at home.

2) Be Rich – A rich man is a magnet to a beautiful woman. You'll often see the decorative girls in the company of the wealthy.

3) Be Handsome – You will find some people say "Looks don’t matter". A woman likes to be looked up to by her friends with an undercurrent of envy. Looks matter to them – make yourself look the best you can.

4) Be Physically fit – If you are in shape, you can handle both the good and the bad, from her and her world. Mostly it gives you more confidence too.Try The 12 week muscle building program By Brad Pilon M.Sc.

5) Be Highly Confident – You’ve seen the guy in the bar with the sideways baseball cap and the pathetic blonde on his arm following him. Women love the guys we call rubbish. Because the woman are inadequate in themselves, they think they need a protector - be confident enough to give that impression. (You don't need the bar or other loose tart, being with a real and easy confidence attracts a better quality person to you.)

6) Do Not Supplicate to Her – Like a pet almost, they like the security when someone else is in control. Keep her under control if she is not in the equal contribution group, not her keeping you.

7) Be Funny but not Self-Deprecating – Women need to be teased, as this has been their life to date, but they do not love when you make fun of yourself.
Study successful comedians, that do not depreciate others. Mr Bean is pretty good at it.
She wants to look up to you - so don’t tear yourself down, even in a joking manner.

8) Do Not Be Needy – Needy people are used by people or avoided. Get some self reliance started. These woman have been trained from a toddler to express their needs - yours mean nothing to them, unless they get there own way at some point.

9) Don’t be a Nice Guy – You don’t have to be mean or rude to all women, you just don’t ever want to be thought of as a "nice guy"- they get concerned you'll be taken from them, or taken advantage of - then them losing their security.

10) Be Pre-occupied with Your Own WorldMake her a part of your world. Whatever you are excited about she will have to learn to be genuinely interested in as well.
If not - confine your time to the one aspect she may offer you, and focus on your life, and associating with others that support this.
There are many women interested in guy's pursuits e.g. hunting, fishing,cars.trucks etc. Do not become a part of her world – do not stay at home and watch chick flicks and TV shows about gay dancers or whatever that is that’s popular right now.
Do your own thing and make sure it is a priority for you. If you have nothing going on then start a new hobby and work on that.

11) Don’t be Too Available It might seem like she wants a full time handbag (be very aware these get changed as soon as her friends comment on them). What most want is to know you are there for them - and not in bed with someone else. If you are - plan wisely to succeed.

12) Have Excellent Style – Give her an excuse to come and talk to you. Smile often, and be happy with life.
Clothe yourself  to give the impression of security - even charity shop clothes can look amazing - get the women assistants on your side with a story.

13) Make Decisions – When she says "what do you want for dinner?" you say shall we have-"Roast partridge with everything, and then dessert and wine".
Don’t play the "I dunno, what do you want?" game, or "I'd love rice, vegan, fried turtle toenails or locust eggs because you love them."
1- Nearly every western educated woman thinks either white rice, or McDonalds is a superior nutrition choice - you will die before 60 eating their fashionable food choices
and 2- They want to be lead, as this is their life training.

14) Be Assertive in Bed – Women do not like timidity, especially in the bedroom. Be a Gentleman in public, be a caveman in private. By all means study the  Kama Sutras together....and practice them, but you suggest the next move.

15) Do Not Fall for Internet Pick-Up Artist (PUA) advice – These programs. have a few good ideas, but even the lowest qualilty woman see through them, and now you. Concentrate on this list here, and be yourself.

16) Do not take advice from women about how to win a woman’s heart –Not even your mother, if you really get on with a close sister - maybe. They will lie to your face and tell you to be nice, buy her things, bring her roses and all the other things destined to diminish you. They will also lie to other women and say things like ....no, you aren’t fat! You should eat what you want! Your haircut doesn’t make you look like a boy, it’s super cute!
As inadequate beings, competition by any means is their mantra.

17) Give up Masturbation and Internet Porn - Porn is good for retraining your mind to accept different behaviors or norms. Also to see that there are some attractive women in the world - who do take care of themselves, and know how to act . Use the contact form if you want some good sites.
Reducing your attention to it, will do wonders for your confidence, your energy levels, your ambition and your charisma.
Masturbation on your own, is a good quick biochemical release, yet you will get more of a better quality woman when you can mentally control your 'hormones.' Buy and read Napoleon Hill's books.


18) Don’t Be Scared to Say Hi – Picking up women is simply a numbers game. If you see a desirable girl on the street, and she gives you some eye contact, go ahead and say "hi". "Hello" is a bit formal, "hi" is much better. To get over that fear of talking to women make a deal with yourself to say hi to 5 girls one day, 6 girls the next day, 7 girls the next - all ages and types - (remember the competition thinking; they are watching) - and so on until it’s a matter of habit. Next thing you know they want to talk to, and be with you..

19) Be skillful at something - Better you are not a showoff or blowhard, you'll only attract groupies with STD's, or baby factories looking to strip you of your assets and life. Do hide your wallet.
Having a skill, craft, or work even music, cooking, dog training, fly-fishing, sports etc, or other - allows them to look up to you, and talk to their 'friends' about you (respect.) And you enjoy your life.

20) Make sure you know there are many good women; best not to tell them this, yet if you have this true belief- your confidence and attractiveness will bring you many rewards.

21) Stay clean- STD's are an inconvenience at best, keep yourself clean, and assume they are not, until proven otherwise. Shower or bathing, and mouth washing immediately before sex should be an absolute, say something about now you love the feel of them after a shower/bath; and if you have sex for more than a couple of hours at a time - take a break, both of you shower/sauna/swim or bathe - then return to the fun.
Clean yourself between partners if you have more than one; - as well as freshening up by bathing, spermicidal gels are a good and socially acceptable inter-partner disinfectant, even if you have worn a condom.
(Read the label before applying, and follow the instructions.)

22) Get a vasectomy- it costs only a little, especially compared to a lifetime of emotional or financial drain; it should really be every lad's 14 year old birthday present.
Get affidavits receipts, and the clinical report following to show the success of it, and upload them somewhere private and safe - say DriveHQ . Keep it all to yourself, and have fun.
It can be reversed when needed, and there are many little children that need adopting - if this woman is suggesting children or talking about them, - Can you afford you, her, and them for the next 20 plus years??
Does she have a plan that she will act on to help you??- if not find a better deal - she will.

23) Get other people talking about you - most of my film, music, and TV personality friends find it easy to collect women or men of their choice.
Again, all the woman wants to do is is to satisfy her mother's unlived life, or be the top reptile in her gossip group of friends.
  As pathetic as that is - that is their destiny - so you may as well capitalize on it.
Doesn't need to be fame so much, more societal recognition with spending money. As many a priest, or guru will tell you. Do stick to what you want - good people in any pastime or work with other people's promotion is the aim.

24) Travel- It allows you to see all the choices in the world, it makes you appealing to her, as you can talk about all these mystical places with all the future that promises - It indicates you can focus on a goal and are unafraid to go through it.
 It gives her a concern you are a free spirit, so she will have to work at the relationship to be part of it - have you read and done #22 above?? Be aware of being trapped, there are only 10% of woman suitable for a partnership at best.

NB. If at any time they minimize you or your things, and do it once more after you've told them nicely that this is a better way to speak or think - find a new one as quietly and quickly as you can,
One does not tear down a money machine still expecting cash next week.

These woman are disposable, no matter even if they look beautiful, are ok in bed (there is always better), or wealthy- and you must allow yourself better.  

There are plenty more, just waiting for you now.



Go back and start with 8-9 of the above traits and you will see the change in women. 

Remember that 90 % of western woman, are brought up, trained by society and advertising, to be dependent passives; - you like in life must take charge to get anything close to what you want. 


The real truth is that you need to concentrate on your success and life, you do need to be the master of your own domain, and you do need to bring her into your world and not drop into her world (like always watching chick flicks, or eating diet food or white rice and chocolate biscuits every Friday night), and you need to hold yourself to a masculine standard.

You choose some of the furniture in your domain.

If you are not a woman, you don't need to act like one. Nor should she act like a 'man.'

Appreciate her, encourage her partnership with your life if you trust her, or trust her in the areas you might trust her - do not worship her, save that for the gods.
Then she has her psychic needs met and you will get your needs met, everybody is happy.




Some recommended links to start you on your better life.....

Buy Roy Sheppards book - "..Be The One", and read it, and start to work at it


Discover the ideas to achieve the life of your dreams, with help from the master of success. Shop for popular personal achievement resources that give you a competitive advantage in business and in life!







Napoleon Hill's books - the bibles of success.












Develop a millionaire mindset easily and quickly with -Develop a millionaire mindset easily and quickly with us








Plan your next escape ; - you choose where to - with Webjet.

 


Again - check these girls out to find a good woman Russian Brides - Russian and Ukrainian Women



photo courtesy of pixabay

Successes of the Tarot in finding my new life path, and a new relationship partner.

fairy princess bringing the spells of love and success with the tarot?
 Fairy princess spells, and a new life.
Tarot Spells - Fact Or Fiction ?  Spells, meditation, affirmations, and expectation.

Does the reading of the Tarot help in any way to predict your success in life or romance?

Well surprisingly it does have a positive effect. Should you read upon it, then dismiss it, probably not much.

Yet to clear the mind of the daily pressures with a desire to find an answer, a good reading will bring you to considering a changed pathway.

As you have the symbols brought to you; if they are re-associated or linked with a past known event or impression - then your mind and consideration is brought to a future expectation. One would hope you will put the effort in to progressively adapt yourself, to bring that expectation to some sort of reality.
Thus the secrets are revealed. Read the paragraph above again, and take notes to establish the simple methods of success.

Meditative commands or interceptions, work because of the way you have been taught as a child in school - similar methods of a perceived authority figure, quietness,(isolation from distractions), exposure, linking, absorption, then reconsideration.

Another word form the same process is a spell. They are extremely powerful because of the above, should you consider their frame. They are one easy way of helping you on the way to a life you desire.

Sometimes, even if you do not see or show what you really feel, the universe always knows and it only presents you what it knows is best for you. If you view life like this, you will be able to handle any event or 'issue.'


  Can you get your ex back with the Tarot? On one hand it is possible to get an ex back with the help of a love spell, however, there are certain catches to it.

  • The first possibility is for you to get exactly what you want; this is the most ideal possibility that any person can dream of.
  • The second possibility is for you to not get what you want because this is not exactly what has to happen for you.
  • And thirdly, there is also a chance that a completely different person will come into your life.
This is actually a good thing most of the time because the universe has already determined that you have asked for someone not suitable for you, and thus has found the one who is.

It is important that should you do these powerful love spells, you keep an objective and open mind about it so that you will not miss what the universe is actually trying to tell you. And be open to all three possibilities.


Some of the things you learn in schooling or church are of little use to you now - but remember the method they used, and use it for yourself to get what you want.


Again meditative commands or interceptions, work because of the way you have been taught as a child in school - similar methods of a perceived authority figure, quietness,(isolation from distractions), exposure, linking, absorption, then reconsideration.

As you have the symbols brought to you; if they are re-associated or linked with a past known event or impression - then your mind and consideration is brought to a future expectation. 

One would hope you will put the effort in to progressively adapt yourself, to bring that expectation to some sort of reality.
Thus the secrets are revealed.


The Tarot helps - use it; - used as it is meant to be, it is another tool in your magic chest for getting what you want in life. It does make it easier for you.



Live Tarot readers for you today.


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Why does everyone else seem to be happy? What is their secret?

Finding happiness within our child self
A youthful happiness for us.
Finding your Happiness, is it even possible?

Picture the child at the playground, or the party, - with bags of lollies or nice clothes. She or he is surrounded by toys, doting parents, and other happy kids.

Yet, although their world appears to be exactly as they’d want it, they are sobbing in apparent distress.

A dramatic representation for sure, yet many of us are not all that different from the little boy or girl on the playground. Many of us are going about, or seeing happiness distinctly wrong.

Despite what we may believe,or are told, we are not really seeking our own happiness at all. We at times don’t know ourselves well enough to figure out what we actually want. We conform to the ideas and ideals of our society, our family, and other influences, that sway our own point of view.

Unless we are careful, we spend our lives repeating patterns and filling other's prescriptions from our past, that don’t serve us in the present, and we wind up seeking someone else’s idea of happiness for us.

There are many influences from our early environment that we internalize, repeat or adapt to.
For example, a narcissistic parent who acted superior and domineering. Perhaps, she boasted about herself, while putting you down or disregarding you completely. Growing up, you may take on her point of view toward yourself.
You will have mean thoughts or “critical inner voices” that tell you you’re inferior or that you are insignificant and only take up space.

You'll also run the risk of repeating the negative traits of your parent, in which case, you’ll notice having your own thoughts or feelings of superiority or entitlement.

Maybe you’ll act out the same condescending, critical attitudes toward your children, or your partner/s, or sidestep confrontation, to retreat into your self and avoid standing out.

These adaptations will have made you feel safe in your childhood, but these same traits will be hurting you and holding you back as an adult.

To achieve true happiness, we have to drop the baggage from our past, and resist any urge to play the victim role that others prefer us in.
When we acknowledge our own ability to choose, and thence our own power, we have a much stronger sense of resilience and can better handle life.

 Happiness involves maturity, knowing we that can’t control others, only ourselves.
Being parental toward those around us keeps us from focusing on changes we can make for ourselves. On the other side, being childish and allowing others to control us, again, undermines our power and potential.

Overall, contentment or happiness doesn’t come from filling our days with fun things. Thrill-seeking and instant gratifications don’t work for too long, as we become numb to them, or tired of the efforts as they fail to fulfill us on a deeper level.
To find and lead a life that has particular meaning to us, we can feel more satisfied and joyful.


   Happiness means being willing to evolve. We are most alive when we plan and expand and try new things. Happiness means maintaining your interest in new and lively choices that will keep the spark inside you alive.

When we look at these principles, we quickly realize that seeking happiness isn’t selfish. When we are authentic, happy and fulfilled individuals, we are far better for the people around us and for society at large.
We are better parents, better partners, better bosses, co-workers, friends and citizens. As we follow the path we have carved for ourselves, we can still expect old influences to seep in and critical inner voices to flood our heads.

It is up to us to satisfy, and answer those thoughts to some degree, thus freeing us, and allowing our release from their hold.

We then become the designers of our happiness, and begin to lead a fulfilling life.




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To get a romantic love, is it possible for me? - or an external force?

Love and fate
Fate in romances, and our choices
It seems as if love is like an external force. It’s something that happens to us, strikes us like the romantic cupid's arrow or overcomes us like a sunny day.

The problem with thinking of love this way, and that is that it focuses outward. It overlooks our own sense of power and leaves us to believe that we are victims of our romantic fate, without control.

Subconsciously this may be true, yet really we do have the abilities within to get what we want.

There are many popular reasons why people are either single or pulling out of their relationship.

  • "I don't want to be hurt"
  • "Women are so dramatic."
  • "Men just want sex."
  • "I’m just not good at intimacy."
  • "I need to be by myself right now."
  • "No one finds me attractive."
  • "I'm too busy right now."

These statements are often based on critical inner voices, destructive thoughts directed toward oneself and others.
Most of this negative self-talk is wrong (and is often someone else's statements we have taken on):-  and can be covering up something else — something deeper.

If we want to give ourselves the best chance of finding and maintaining a rich and rewarding relationship, we have to look inside ourselves. The dating world can be full of obstacles, but our worst enemy is usually in our own heads.

Love for some of us, is the ultimate experience in that we feel so attuned and connected to someone else.
Yet, hopefully it is also a process of adventure and discovery that is internal.

Understanding that inner world is really the most important to letting ourselves get close to someone else. And keeping that romance happening for us.

Here are a few ways we may be getting in our own way when it comes to intimacy.

1. Avoiding pain:

Love hurts. The saying is both tired and true. Yet, as much as it gets lamented in pop songs or portrayed on movie screens, we don’t really let it sink in. Part of us feels, once we find the right person and make the smart choices, love will be easy — blissful, less complicated than all those other relationships around us.

Many people pull back the moment things get close. Caring about another person deeply is a truly painful thing. It makes us value them more, ourselves more and our lives more. Inevitably, it reminds us of time and loss. On another level, love challenges an old and familiar identity. It brings us into maturity and forces us to separate from our past. When we get close to someone, it shifts underlying emotions — things we’ve buried and sat on for years.  We have to recognize the ways we’ve been hurt and understand how those wounds inform our current behavior. This means being willing to feel pain without trying to numb ourselves or gloss over the feelings that come up.

2. Retreating into a fantasy:

Once people get scared in their relationship, many couples have a tendency to form a fantasy bond, a defense that allows us to feel as if we’ve joined with another person. (Soul-mates for the time).

 This illusion will make us feel safe and secure,and seems to offer a sense of control and security,
but it undermines most feelings of real love. When people retreat into fantasy they start to relate as a unit, presenting themselves as a couple instead of as two individuals who are genuinely drawn to each other.

They start to impose confines and restrictions on each other, so neither party feels threatened,(hopefully), yet both feel limited. They become critical and demanding toward each other rather than respecting each other’s individuality and independence.
And this, for most, creates a hotbed for resentment and drives them apart.


Couples are much better off maintaining a sense of themselves as two separate people with sovereign minds who genuinely care for and appreciate each other.

This independence encourages us to respect our partner and treat him or her kindly. Only when we see someone as separate from us, can we genuinely care about how they feel, and we are better able to keep our attraction to them, and our-self, alive.


3. Protecting ourselves:

Both men and women say how much they want to find love, then, once they find it, feel like not being  close for some reason or reasons.

Some complained of feeling tied down or pulled on, and others become incredibly insecure and jealous. Every single one of these people could trace these reactions back to their early lives: parents who intruded on them or rejected them, caretakers who shamed them or frightened them. (The invocation of others again).
In response to painful events in their life, these people adapted, taking care of themselves or vowing to never trust anyone.
These survival mechanisms do serve a purpose, yet can leave us isolated from some possibly good for ourselves.
These defenses push our partners away and end up causing a lot of pain.
Getting to know our defenses is a key step in learning how we limit ourselves in our relationships.


4. Believing our inner critic:

 The critical inner voice is an inner enemy - or must be treated as one- that drives us to avoid closeness, to shut off emotions and retreat into a fantasy.
It puts us down in countless ways, tearing into our appearance, performance, personality and aspirations. It is a pain, in the sense that it both soothes and punishes us.
Sometimes, it sounds like a mean coach, "No one will ever want you". Other times it sounds like a comforting parent, "Don’t bother with...you are just fine on your own."

The critical inner voice can and will seriously undermine our life and our romantic desires.
It turns us against us, and our partner or potential partner in ways that make it even harder to achieve real success or intimacy.
This voice is a phantom from our past. It is not represent the true reality.
It is indeed a destructive filter through which we see the world that tries to keep us in someone else's box or place in life.

At every stage of a relationship, when the critical inner voice tries to exert its influence, we must confront it as a third-party threat. Make sure to identify it and separate it from your real point of view. There are useful exercises and techniques to help you do this. See the links below- they do work.

Recognizing you have a power in your relationship by challenging your past defenses. doesn’t mean not liking, or even blaming yourself. Quite the opposite - you can feel good about becoming the best you can be.

It allows you to work on the only thing you have any real control over in your relationship, you.
When you’re able to maintain a sense of yourself as an independent, aware, and loving individual, then no matter what anyone else says or does, you will feel your own sense of control and empowerment, and stay open to success in the real love in your life.

 *****


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How to get back to normal after a threatening and horrible event, finding a path way through.

Cage of life and humanity
Cage of life and humanity
Getting back to normal after a threatening and horrible event, or even finding a path way through the mixed emotions we feel, and the events we relive in our minds; seems like an insurmountable struggle against the world.

Fear becomes a way of life. You don't trust yourself, and don't trust anyone else, either. Some people respond to their outer critics by acting out against others, or to batten down the hatches and disappear.

Most peoples responses are to never fully trust again, period.

In moderation, that is a valid approach in part, as the trusting-ness often led us into the situation. 
Put back in your mind though; that not 100% of the world are awful 100% of the time. Some good in humanity, and nature at different times, does exist.

Being labelled with PTSD or Post-Traumatic Stress, it does seem accurate - all we really want to do is:-

1- not have had it happened,

2- never have it happen again to us,

3- destroy the person or cause responsible, for some small level of satisfaction.
 (number 3 is a good plan - but stay within your regime's or jurisdiction's law - 
- it does save time and hassles) 

4-focus on rebuilding what we had, or desired.


********

 Despite it all being “invisible” externally, is as real as a devastating physical wound, for those that suffer its disabling effects.

On a positive note - in time - we do become healed, and better equipped for the future with our new knowledge.

It can keep getting triggered by small reminders, only serving to hold us, or put us back in a place of not coping, or unsure even if our feelings our valid, or is it OK to even think that way.

No one else, really understands what we have been through, and they offer only bandages or platitudes which serve to cover the inner damage we feel.

To us it is as real as this moment now sometimes, - our inner critic's voices questioning us, and the seeming intensity of all we only wish to be dulled, so that we can cope, and get on with our life.

We do need to silence the lies that those inner voices (responses) tell us about ourselves, that we have used for so long as part of a coping method. -  (NB. they are usually invocations from someone wanting power over you).
The inner critic tells you that you're defective and responsible for every bad thing that happens to you. The outer critic tells you that most human beings shouldn’t be trusted because they are all potentially, dangerous.
Both your inner critic and outer critic lie to you.

Most of the stress comes from the list of thoughts above, and our lack of resources, or even being allowed to deal with it.

Your plan for you, is to develop thoughts of altering your responses, not abolishing the feelings.

To re-frame the events and responses as a movie (in which you are a less passionate observer is perfect, or to re-frame or physically distance yourself is as good).

Being respectful of a your internal resistance, is critical in your long term improvement...gentle, respectful work is amazingly powerful.

*not pushing for results- as your abuser/authority has done, and who are never satisfied until they fully disable you, driving you into a deep depression and isolation from others - This is the politician's,- banker's,- abuser's,- authority's, and warmonger's game plan, to have ultimate control over you.

Whether it is war, losing friends, family, or your things; being hurt physically or psychologically - we can improve our lives to a happy place - or one of contentment with ourselves at least.

You are allowed, and it is OK to become the leader in your own life.



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I'm lonely, - how do I get the Love others have? part 10 - love spells bringing you success.

Creating your own reality by design
Creating your own reality by design.
Part 10, of the simple 10 steps to go from lonely to being in love.

Step 10: Love Spells


We are still in the esoteric mode - just stay with it - the poems and the associations have a sound and effective basis.

Now you can cast your spell.

Do Yesterday’s Exercise first-

 Yesterday’s exercise: Look over your list again. Do you think it is right, or are there changes to make? 

Make whatever changes you think are necessary before you cast your spell. This will help you be definite when you make your spell, and it will assure that what you think you want is what you really want.

Now we go to work;- well fun really.

There are 'love spells' for you, no matter what your ideas: Christian, New Age, Heathen, Wiccan, metaphysician, etc. A few samples.are here to start you on the road.

Each tradition usually has its own set of love spells for you to use.

Now cast your spell!


Metaphysical Style Type Spoken Spell

There is One Mind, One principle, One Universal Soul, One Love, and I am one with that One.
I am now connected with the Universal Love of the One, and through my word I am sending it forth now.
The great Love, guided by the All-Knowing Mind, is now seeking and finding companions for me. The power knows the right ones for me. It knows where they are, and I let it work to bring them to me.
This One great power is now attracting to me my rightful friends/companion. It is drawing them to me, and they will be seen in good order.
I know that the power is working for me, and I give thanks that new friends (companion) are in my life. So it is!

Heathen Spoken Spell

Three ladies danced across the land

                                        Bringing love into my hand:
                                                      The first called him [or, her]
                                                      The second brought him,
                                         The third bound us together.
                                                    Whatever the weather.


Candle Spell

Use a green or pink candle with an easy appropriate incense (Jasmine, Apple or your favourite new one). Get a small, inexpensive figurine of a cat. It can be as tiny as you wish. Start the spell normally. If Pagan, invoke a deity related to Love. As a key point of your spell, place the figurine beside the candle. Speak the following charm:

Kitten, kitten, hark to me,
A lover (friends) I would have, you see.
Look and find that one for me
Bring him (her) to me, so will it be!

Christian prayer.

Oh Lord, I ask for your forgiveness for all my sins, and now pray to you to help me become one with you.
As I get better, I know you will guide the right people to me, so we can continue in our path together in Christ.
As I let you bring them to me, my faith will let me determine those who are a joy to our journey.
I thank you Oh Lord,
Amen.



You can make your own - in fact to have a 2-4 line saying you have created for you - is the ultimate 'spell' to quickly and easily get that you have planned for yourself.

It has to be positive - I used to say 'I'm not having that', which is a good standards determination.
But my success immediately improved, and remarkably once I sat down for a while and came up with a 2 line rote which I internalized - that was a possibility re-frame.



1:

Yesterday’s exercise: Look over your list again. Do you think it is right, or are there changes to make? Make whatever changes you think are necessary before you cast your spell. This will help you be definite when you make your spell, and it will assure that what you think you want is what you really want.



2:

Meditation: See yourself stepping out into the world, glowing with brilliance. Imagine yourself as confident, lovable, and happy. Know that as this energy radiates from you, it brings you more of the good companionship you seek. Know that your inner lovability is now working for you, and that you deserve all the good you desire.


3:

Exercise:You can buy or make a love charm, either to carry or to place. Get one posted from Amazon, or go to the local dollar store. It does-not have to be expensive -much like the cat figurine for the  new age candle prayer, it is a talisman or symbol. Re-read the silver spoon post here.
If you can, make something, or a 2 or 3 of them, the process, meditation, and thinking while making will work wonders.
Put the charm were you see it each morning and night -if not carried with you if small.

If a personal relationship turns to an unwanted one- revise, and bring out the talisman again.




Thought for the Day:  I am ready to go forward, confident that I am lovable. I will attract the people who make me happy, and who are happy with me.


PS:-Note again how this also works for success in anything.



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