Never close down from life for too long, take some time out for sure- but move forward and learn from it. As the iceberg is, so are you, with the stable base.
You can do more than learn from negative experiences, you can use
them to inspire you. Of course -we hope - that you did not overtly choose the negative choice, and if you did -was the reason for your benefit?
A Martyr without good thinking or values, is soon forgotten.
Think about the power of
taking intense negative energy and using this energy positively.
If
something bad happens, practice channeling this energy into something positive.
This is
a massive advantage and something that will help you greatly.
How many times have you allowed something that later was not important, to affect you in a negative way?
Over-reacting to an insult?
Being not asked to that dinner or party?
If you were fired from a job, did you get depressed and withdraw?
If you searched for a job for a long time with no success, did you let your failure to find the ideal job get you down?
All of these responses are only natural sometimes.
Always best to treat life similarly to the four seasons of:- Summer >Autumn >Winter >Spring, and whatever joy and meaning you give to each- the most important thing is after thousands of years they still follow on from each other.
The following story about Michael Jordan relates his key to success, and the key to doing well in everything. Jordan is widely viewed as the best basketball player of all time, but when he tried out for his high school basketball team, he didn’t make it. He could have become depressed and stopped hanging around with the other high school basketball players. He could have given up on athletics and started doing something else, like spending his time with bad kids. He could have allowed himself to get fat and lazy. There are of things Jordan could have done when he failed to make the high school basketball team.
Jordan’s reaction was different. He started practicing more. He used his disappointment to propel him toward trying harder and getting and better. After only two years of college basketball (he made his college team), Jordan became a professional player. The rest is history.
In an interview with Jordan years ago he was describing the secret to his success. In this interview he said when he is insulted by other people he allows these insults to just “build up,” and then he uses them as “jet fuel” for his next game. Anything bad that happens to him and any slight he receives he uses to make himself better at his game and give him passion.
That can be your choice too-no need to tell everyone about it, just go and start to do it.
I am sure you are like most of us and bad things have happened to you. Your reaction is the key to whether you succeed or fail.
The worst thing you can do is allow someone or something negative push you down and keep you down.
Be like Michael Jordan- or choose another role model. Prove to yourself you can handle what people and life challenge you with.
Abraham Lincoln’s story is one of the common told- and it is a fine example:-
1831 – Lost his job
1832 – Defeated in run for Illinois State Legislature
1833 – Failed in business
1834 – Elected to Illinois State Legislature (success)
1835 – Sweetheart died
1836 – Had nervous breakdown
1838 – Defeated in run for Illinois House Speaker
1843 – Defeated in run for nomination for U.S. Congress
1846 – Elected to U.S. Congress (success)
1848 – Lost re-nomination
1849 – Rejected for land officer position
1854 – Defeated in run for U.S. Senate
1856 – Defeated in run for nomination for vice president
1858 – Again defeated in run for U.S. Senate
1860 – Elected U.S. President (success)
Think about all of Lincoln’s failures- nearly 30 years of them. Many people would give up on life after a nervous breakdown. Lincoln kept going.
Persevere and decide for you, what is important.
For many people, a bad experience can become a filter for how they view their lives. They begin having an expectation in the future that other bad things will happen and begin to avoid situations where they believe these bad things will occur.
They also often begin associating with others who support them in their negative view of the world. complaining in forums and coffee groups. Been there, done that- it was great to know others had been through similar things; but they are still there- being important in their demeaning of self. Growth????
Think about negative groups of people you may know like this. Low achievers avoid situations where there has been some sort of pain before. They allow this pain to continue influencing them.
Children often close so many doors in their life by simply avoiding areas where they have been in pain before. Immature adults do the same thing.
Now some serious 'challenges' do happen, and it can take a long time to escape them- yet escape them you must; and rethink your position. As we've said before- beware of the hooks--there are thousands of ineffective support agencies out there. Use them like a crutch or a cast for a sprained ankle- for a short time.
Instead, imagine the power you would have if you used something negative to change your life.
In medicine, pain is a neurological (nerve/sense/brain) feedback response to a blockage- think of the bruise after you kicked your toe or walked into something.
You will generally experience this pain; the pain you feel is actually a very good thing.It shows you that things are working up to that point.
Experience the pain and then use this pain to change the blockage so things work better in the future.
When you know that you can use negative energy in a positive way you will never have to be fearful of bad experiences because you will know these experiences will ultimately help you and not hurt you.
photo courtesy of www.PublicDomainFiles.com, by US Air Force
