As a woman can I have it all? Determining my own path..

As a women having it all

I had thought before, that a great measure of civilization might be the influence of good women. - Adapted from - Ralph Waldo Emerson 

We’ve all seen great examples of women who appear to juggle a successful career along with entertainment, life, and motherhood.
Women are asked to stay emotionally attached to their career path and to not leave as soon as they plan for a family.

The discussion at times has been pitting working mothers against stay-at-home mothers. An engineered war of division?
The stay-at-home mothers at times are either envied or looked down on for having left the corporate world. Especially, since marketing and society is heavily pushing for more women to enter the corporate world and the realm of politics. One would guess so as to be seen as role models, so that the subservient ones will buy the merchandise they wear and promote, of course as well as another taxation unit - almost like another duped farm animal sadly.

Yes, we can have it all, but can we do it all, and more importantly — is having and doing it all truly, truly what we want? Ask some questions to consider your true path.....


1. Get honest with yourself. What do you truly want? Write out your own definition of success. What does it allow you? This is not about what your family,friends, minister, or work 'friends' think you should do with your life. It’s about what you want deep down in your heart.
Then start quietly creating that ideal for you, day by day, and keep going- based upon how you’ve crafted your purpose.

2. Allow other women to create their own success definitions. We need to give other women the right to choose what they want. Just because you might not want to be a stay-at-home mom doesn’t mean that someone else isn’t entitled to make this choice.

3. Throw out the 50% rule. While we might represent any % of the population, yet do we truly need to fight for anyone else's cause? Our choice shouldn’t be based upon this percentage, or the desire to be seen as accepted by the group, but because this is something we truly desire. Go and read the bold sheep post, then come back here.

4. In saying that - join together with other women to create your own cause, not 'society's'. Don’t be the lone ranger out there; look for other women who can help you influence the redefining of success for women and men.

5. Communicate clearly and persuasively. Use your voice to impact change. Challenge people to rethink their expectations of women and men in the workplace and what careers have to look like. Let women know that they have choices and don’t have to follow a subscribed path. Paint a new picture for what success can look like for women.
And especially yourself.



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A bold sheep? Black. white, or colored - questions of personal identity.

As a bold sheep we stand out

   As the black sheep you may feel like you are forever trying to outrun a dark shadow. 

 If you are known as the 'black sheep' of your family, you mightn’t wear that title happily. It’s usually a shaming, blaming and otherwise labelled position to be in.

You are set up as an outsider - someone who doesn’t fit in, 'stupid, mentally fragile or incompetent,' -- when you may be one of the highest functioning members of your family.

If you are asking: “Do I fit in, - is my non-traditional approach, or my creative ability, going to be or is OK? You could well be destined - with action -to great things in life.
 The honing of  your identity is something to take great pride in; an original is worth a whole lot more than a replica.
“You” are enough. History has shown us Einstein, Tesla, DaVinci, Michelangelo and so on -a value of being unique.

Loners, misfits, and black sheep that you are - continue being yourselves. It at times is a war to fight 'normal-ness' every day. It’s a law of attraction, the more you love what makes you different, the more the right people will love that too.

Being different and being confident shows a great strength and bravery. 

 

When you conform, you wave the white flag, you destroy everything that makes you special Keep shinning even if most people can’t handle it. It is not your job to make them feel comfortable with other people shining bright, their life is their own. 

 

Don’t live up to anyone’s ideals or water yourself down for anyone! - and watch as you are rewarded by having the right people flow towards you.  

 

These are the people who will understand you, share the same interests as you, and will embrace and love you for who you are. 

 

Whatever moves you, inspires you, or makes you happy, keep doing that. You have one life to live, and it’s yours to cherish in the days following. 

 

Creativity has always been currency - now is a good time to start for you. 

 

 I’ve spent most of my life as the so called black sheep, to be successful you must be a little different - at least in attitude. It's easy to be that way, when you think of the rewards.


We all don’t have to be alike and the world would be such a better place if we embraced what made us all different instead of allowing our differences to set us apart.

                                                                        ****

The world is backwards it seems...it is no surprise really.

 You grow up having people tell you who you should be, how you should think, and what you should do with your life. Your teachers run through the same old curriculum, and the only way you get to learn philosophy is when you choose to.

 You would think being human is simply fundamental, something that happens naturally, but no…Some people have to be taught. Some never learn :).

We are all a product of our environment. My parents allowed my individuality, usually encouraging with a guiding hand, and its a huge reason why I am who I am today.

Some people have to be told  "don’t follow these age-old rules and go follow your ideal. Find what you are passionate about, and do it as much as possible - or be passionate about what you are doing."

Seeing the younger generations of children today makes me realize I was a strong youth. I knew conforming would not make me happy long term. The more I was challenged for being different, the more I wanted to be myself.

Most children fall under pressure. I knew early on in life that I would have to learn to value myself because often I felt unheard.
I knew it was the only way I would survive and do well.


Key point; - You have to be real special if someone is telling you that you aren’t.

 I know I have a light that threatens, sometimes makes others unsure of their chosen place, but that’s not my problem..and if you shine and someone is trying to dim your light, it is not your problem either.

Only insecure people have a problem with other people’s success and only they compare themselves to others.


You think that children don’t know what insecurity means until they get older, but you are wrong. Kids are bullied every single day for trying to be themselves. Some are forced into uncomfortable situations of conformity to feel safe.
Some are forced to fight other kids and to be a part of groups/gangs that bully others. It is the only way they feel protected. Now, let that resonate, are you blending in to be in a safe group? Is that indeed helping you?

Do whatever makes you comfortable, but do it for all of the right reasons.
Don’t be modest just so you don’t offend people. You are allowed to think you look beautiful today.

 You are allowed to wear that item collecting dust in your closet for any occasion - not just a special one. 

You are allowed to like music everyone else hates, you are allowed to love the 50s even if your friends all like today's music. You have got to own your own individuality.


You should never ever have to feel pressured to be a part of something. If the people you like can’t accept who you are than you need to find another group of people to be with. Maybe they are no longer the right group to associate with, for you.


And you know what’s the best about being the black sheep? You  begin to believe you are so different, you can’t even compare yourself to others. Can you imagine the stress you avoid by not comparing yourself to others? You have got to own your differences and embrace your blueprint because no one was designed like you.




Be brave in your choice of identity - Be different - be anything but a copy of someone else and love yourself  




Recommended Links to help you...

Become the best you can be with Mindmint

Grow yourself online in the privacy of your own home




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Become Self Assertive, and more a Confident you, from today with -

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Pedigree Sheep  breeders software from zooeasy - the ultimate program for breeding and raising sheep!







photo courtesy ofwww.publicdomainpictures.net/Axel Kuhlmann

Deal with criticism you will face - the unfair comments .....

You cannot make everyone happy. It is an admirable desire, but not 100 percent possible. The more you base your actions on trying to make others happy all the time, the more trouble you seem to experience.

As in the tree being uprooted as it is blown in all directions.

 You cannot stop all people from talking negatively about you and criticizing you. The more you try to get others to approve of you, the more you will end up at their level - their comfort zone - being most likely mediocre.

If you are progressing, in most cases, your personal and professional success will invoke  more criticism than compliments and congratulations.

The ability to deal with criticism is one of the most important lessons you will ever learn. If you are going to improve and constantly strive toward your goals, you will need to learn how to deal with criticism. Most people stop and pull back when they are criticized, or they simply do not act at all, for fear of being criticized. That is the criticizers intention. Move past it to move on in your life.

If you live your life in fear of criticism, you will never accomplish everything you are capable of accomplishing in your life.

The best way to deal with criticism is to simply not let it bother you. Once you allow others to limit the happiness you can experience, the person who has criticized you has achieved his or her objective.

Everyone has people in their space that will try to use their negative words to influence you, slow you down, or make you angry. The most dangerous of these people are the ones who appear to be your friends but are not.

You must not share everything with these ones - if the gossip about others,  they will gossip about you. Feed them information that helps you only, they only want to be noticed as a speaker of important things.

When someone is critical of you, the best thing you can do is to simply shrug it off and move forward. It doesn’t do you any good to listen to criticism that is intended to limit you. Not everyone is going to be able to understand you and where you are coming from. If you try to win over critics, you will rarely succeed, because for whatever reason, they are threatened by you, and making them feel wrong for criticizing you will not help your situation.

Walk on and shake the dust from your feet.

Most critical people don’t work hard enough to do what it takes to be at their very best. Instead, they do their best to attack and criticize others, in order to make themselves feel better. Let them do this. Then forget about it and move on.

Do not spend your time worrying about what others are saying. Spend your time focused on what you want to do with your life, your dreams, and your aspirations for the future.

Do not allow others to determine your destiny. When you hear criticism of yourself, just walk away and continue on your path. You will forever be held back if you allow others’ criticism of you to affect your happiness.

    People today are getting away with literally, murder; the murder of a dream, of hopes and freedom, it’s just that simple, and no one seems to be watching or caring about that.

Again move on , remember- some seed falls on rocky ground, some the birds get, and some will grow. 



pic courtesy of www.photopublicdomain.com