Falling in love with yourself again - to create a new life direction

Self acceptance.

As we grow older, some of us fall out of love with ourselves, and then, have a trouble isolating what we do value in life, and what truly inspires us.

Self-love. or really self acceptance - is invaluable to creating a life that aligns with our desires, as it serves as our inner compass, empowering and enabling us to steer our life in the direction that makes us happy.

Otherwise, we often, like many, end up turning to external sources for love and happiness. Finding or seeking someone or something to feel completed, or hoping for someone who likes us enough to want to be with us.

If it is a someone, then being so determined or desperate to maintain the relationship, that you ended up trying to be like your partner, doing what they liked so that they’d love you more.

Along the way, setting aside your own interests and loosing touch with friends, and your life path. Should that relationship ever end, the feelings of being empty and alone resurface with a vengeance.

To change that from ever happening - start to bring out your inner child and look for simple ways to create opportunities to laugh, relax, and have your own fun in your life.

This could be going to the park and getting on a swing, enjoying nature, just being with some similarly thinking people without an agenda, or thinking back to something you have really enjoyed that was harmless as a child, and doing it today.

When you incorporate play in moderation into your life, you are giving yourself permission to relax, clear out your mind, and reap the health benefits.

This action in itself is a form of self-care and self-love. Smile at yourself instead of criticizing yourself.

Children adore themselves. They love looking in the mirror and seeing themselves, just the way they are. They smile, they blow kisses to themselves. Alone,or with real friends - there are no judgments.
This is a major factor in feeling alive, and at times giving us hope and helping us grow.

But over time, we start to dim our lights and build walls around our heart. When this happens, we not only close the pathways to love, but also make it hard for others to love us.

Next time when you look in the mirror, challenge yourself to look in your eyes and refrain from being critical. Be kind to yourself.

Smile at the person you see, even if you need to imagine yourself as a younger version of you. Acknowledge your inner spirit with your eyes.

Depending on your upbringing and your experiences, you may have developed certain rules or beliefs about speaking your mind, and remind yourself of where the voice is coming from. It usually is a combination of parents or trusted authority, and conforming yourself to be accepted by others.

As an adult, you now have a choice. Instead of operating like you would have in the past, you can decide if you would like to change your rule or belief.

So why not honor that little voice inside of you and say what you’re thinking to yourself? In doing so, you are expressing your truth, and this is an act of self-love.

In creating a safe, respectful space in your own mind, you’re creating the opportunity to connect with others as well, on a deeper level, strengthening your self-love, and your relationships at the same time.

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The call of the Waizuno, a mythical beauty in the high mountain lake.

Awaking beauty

She stood naked for a while bathing in its beauty, and smoothed her hands gently over the curves of her body.

Slowly, she entered into the tent, and looked upon her sleeping partner- admiring their peaceful breathing.

Hesitating, she collected her clothes, afraid to wake her friend. Backing out through the tent flap smoothly, she paused erect outside.

Hearing a far away splash. 'May have been a fish', she thought.

Almost with regret, she started to cover her body with the clothes for the day. Pulling them on with a practiced flow, that only someone comfortable in their own skin could.

Now clothed, with boots and a soft jacket, she unchained her trusted brindle dog, caressing him as she did.
Standing up again, she ran her hands through her hair, brushed her fringe out of the way, and put on a beanie her mom had given her.

Collecting her new rifle,some homemade jerky, and a bottle of water- she quietly began than 500 yard walk to the lake.

As the little dog ran ahead, she enjoyed the peacefulness of the early morning, listening to the calls of the birds as they awoke too.

Finding herself at the lakes edge, she slipped into the blind, and began to ready herself for the wild animals that regularly came to drink.

Only minutes passed, and family of deer came, and quickly drunk then left - showing obvious signs of nervousness.
She lifted her hat away from her ears, and sat there, contemplating why- she had never seen the deer so anxious before.

Turning around to pick up her water bottle, she heard a splash close to the waters edge.
Looking out she saw the most beautiful creature come from the water, shake the water from its hair and stand there, taking in its surroundings.

Not a woman to be usually afraid, she was taken aback by the seemingly sudden appearance of the creature, and that it was looking directly into her eyes.

Entranced by its gaze, and its perfect form, she put her things down, and went outside.
No words were spoken, though she felt the communication vibrating in her inner self- it was like a talking of souls.

The huntress, began to undress - carefully folding her clothes, and placing them by the blind.When she was naked again, she felt free and at ease.

Moving towards the mythical creature, she took its hand and re-entered the lake, now with small waves, with it with an indescribable sense of belonging.........

The lesson - read this story once a day for a week around a special day:-
basically appreciate your inner beauty.

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Leading myself into situations - How did I get into this one?

And how did I end up here?

You know our thoughts, our hopes of how it is to be, or how it will be, and especially our desire to be accepted - whether it be from our group or authority can shape our activities and results totally.

It seems there isn't an answer to get what we want, rather than what we do get.

What goes into the mind with an emotion - and with acceptance is what will be internalized
(this is who or how I am)- to become yourself.

Generally you must meet all of these criteria to have a long lasting effect.

Examples (for good and bad):-

Sitting with a close friend watching the same type of film over a period of weeks.

Singing in a church you love with a group.

Reading and sharing a series or style of books-then beginning to dress or act like the characters.

When bad stuff happens, accept the fact that it happened- not that it is you.

An old re-shareable story.

A hunter goes into the bush. He finds an old human skull. The hunter says: “What brought you here?” The skull answers: “Talking brought me here.” The hunter runs off to the king. He tells the king: “I found a dry human skull in the bush. It asks you how its father and mother are.”

The king says: “Never since my mother bore me have I heard that a dead skull can speak.” The king summons his advisers and authorities - and asks them if they have ever heard anything like this. None of his wise men has heard the like, and they decide to send guards out with the hunter into the bush to find out if his story is true and, if so, to learn the reason for it. The guards accompany the hunter into the bush with the order to kill him on the spot should he have lied.

The guards and the hunter come to the skull. The hunter addresses the skull: “Skull, speak.” The skull is silent. The hunter asks as before: “What brought you here?” The skull does not answer. The whole day long the hunter begs the skull to speak, but it does not answer. In the evening the guards tell the hunter to make the skull speak, and when he cannot, the guards kill the hunter in accordance with the king’s command.

When the guards are gone, the skull opens its jaws and asks the dead hunter’s head: “What brought you here?” The dead hunter’s head replies: “Talking brought me here!”

The Talking Skull - a translated Nigerian folk tale

*********

Note the finding of a new discovery, consider why did the hunter want to share it with the authority?, the controlling power of the authority, the persistence of the hunter in a way that did not work for him at that time. The finality of it all- his technique of bringing the King and his subservients to the discovery, rather than creating a curiosity so that they would find it themselves. The giving up of power to those who want to maintain the status quo. The hunters belief system, and his actions that brought him his results.

So, how do you change it to get what you want?

Change within to change without - use your emotions to re-define your world.

If it is really difficult - leave for a time:- meditate (or sit quietly listening to the good of nature) - go to a library, and read some harmless humor-find an empty mosque, temple, or church- even and especially if you offer to sweep the floor to be there regularly; - or change where or how you might live.

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