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| Playing - will I win? |
The Rules that Govern Our Lives
We learn, or try to learn, to live in a world that others have created over the course of known history. We are schooled either formally in an institution, or by our observations to the created world around us.
As children often reply, when asked why do they go to school by their parents - "because you, and the government make me go"
People do live life partly on their terms, - some more than others, - and partly following the plans set by other people and society.
Laws, plans, and rules are created by -
1; - governments and institutions, and
2; - a set of rules we think we have made for ourselves; that are reflected in our values, beliefs, and in our personal standards.
Some good and helpful, some not so much.
These rules have been conditioned into our mind over the course of a lifetime by others, and by society in general.
However, we have also played our part in this conditioning process. We have been willing, or unwilling actors - and have accepted things to be that particular way.
Most of us have good intentions and honorable hopes, with dreams and goals for the future, - however the 'rules' which we live our lives unfortunately don’t allow us to realize our desired destination.
It is now time for a change.
Your Childhood Innocence
Think back for a moment to your childhood, with the youthful innocence and enthusiasm that you brought into every activity.
Back then you treated everything as a game. Everything you did was fun and exciting - until someone told you to "grow up".
You were told that life isn’t a game and that you need to take things more seriously. You get told that your actions could have negative consequences; that you need to protect yourself from pain; that you must hold on tight to the things you have, and that you must follow the universally accepted rules that everybody else has grown up with.
The Unfair parts of Life.
- Life is not always filled with perfection.
- There are people you must, and you should have avoided.
- There are organizations you should not trust, or have trusted.
- You will experience different setbacks and problems.
- You may experience a mistake or two.
- You will go through different emotions.
- You will sometimes fail at your choices.
- You will experience criticism and rejection.
- You might occasionally embarrass yourself.
- You will win, but you will find more ways of learning how to win.
Just assume that things could go wrong, and have a plan or two in place to deal with that. And of course continue on with the adaptable plans for your desired future.
One method that leads to acceptance of the 'unfair,' is the act of disassociating yourself emotionally from the experiences.
In fact the standard prose of a manipulative person, is to question if you felt a certain way. Therefore to improve your success you must be aware of this.
In reality there are no absolutely good or bad situations, - it only feels like that at the time - there are interpretations that we as people make.
What one person might interpret as an unfortunate event, another person will interpret that exact same event in a more favorable way.
And because they see it in a favorable way, they can now make more of the situation, instead of playing the victim card. Leave that victim card for others, it is a manipulation technique, that will not help you long term.
Taking the possibility approach will do wonders for your self-confidence.
You take charge of you and now are on the way to living life at a higher level.
10 Good Rules for Playing the Game of Life
Rule 1: Clear Goals
Setting clear goals gives you a definite direction in life and helps you live with a sense of purpose. It redirects all your efforts towards clear aims.Something like the idea, that while you are on the sports field or the court is to get the ball where you want it to go.
Rule 2: Sense of Humor
Humor is a great tool against the adversity that life may drop in front of you. Humor will allow you to move through or around these difficulties without falling into the "victim mentality" trap. Again playing the victim card will not help you win at the game of life - it is in fact a way for you to controlled - be it by an abuser or a 'helping' organization. You must instead use some humor to keep your spirits high while you move forward.
Rule 3: New Skills
Start today, and keep at going daily, weekly, monthly, yearly. It can be either tangible, or hands on skills, or equally as important - thinking and people skills. You can learn from both good and bad, even how not to do it - will save you some time and make it easier for you.
The perpetual life student attitude and practice will bring you fast results.
Rule 4: Calculated Risks
To venture outside your comfort zone. even a little for a start, will change your chances of winning in the game of life. Taking calculated risks and stepping beyond the confines of your normality helps expand opportunities, (luck)- provides a super platform for growth and new insights, helps you solve problems, and also goes a long way towards helping you make better decisions as you make progress through this game of life.
All your problems are solvable, however you will rarely solve them while within the confines of your normal or previous comfort zone. You must stretch beyond that, as this is where opportunity lies for new understandings and perceptions to help you find solutions.
Rule 5: Cherish Friendships
It is better to have a network of people behind you, rather than fighting or hindering you. Sooner or later you will need the support of others to help you win this game. Therefore start by cultivating your friendships today, and care for the good ones as if you wish them to last forever.
Rule 6: Accept the odd Mistake
Life involves the process of learning and growth.You might make the occasional mistake or two. Learn from your mistakes - once or twice is enough - if you are repeating the same mistakes time and again, change something - now!
Learning from a small mistake made today will indeed save you from making a bigger mistake tomorrow.
Or, perchance, learning from a big mistake today does help you gain the clarity you need to move forward in a better way.
Rule 7: Generate Plenty of Ideas and New Experiences
In order to succeed in the game of life you need to be constantly opening yourself up to a world of new experiences. They can come in the form of ideas, people, places and knowledge.
And as you begin to think differently about your life and circumstances you gather unique ideas that you can use to help move your life forward in a better way. New experiences also bring with them new opportunities to help you win in the game of life. That word luck again.
To focus on one overall idea is good, yet to get ahead, different approaches to that idea, or different ideas do open up new and maybe better paths.
Sometime ideas don't turn out 100% as expected. Great, now you can adapt. Experience and responses of others and yourself to these helps you define your direction.
Rule 8: Be a little Kind to Others
It’s said that "those who show kindness will eventually be taken advantage of." And you would be right. There will be people who will certainly take advantage of your kindness, however that’s part of the game of life. Ensure they pay you well in compensation, for that.
Kindness is not letting them take any advantage of you, or you having lesser standards for yourself; it is accepting people where they are at now.
When you are kind to others it often activates the power of reciprocity, and so it should.
Mostly you feel more confident, in control, and fulfilled that you have made a positive difference in someone else’s life.
This confidence empowers your daily decisions and actions to help move your life forward in a better way.
Rule 9: Aim for some Balance
An ideal successful life is a balanced life. A life that promotes good health and provides long-term stability. And the way to achieve it all, is to strive for a balance.
Rule 10: Work Smarter AND Harder
The final rule for winning in the game of life is to work both smarter AND harder. This naturally improves your luck and allows you opportunities that you otherwise would not have had.
Either one on their own, will give rewards, yet to get stable long-term success, both are needed.
One good life philosophy to have is this - from -Will Smith the famous actor, has said-
"The only thing that I see that is distinctly different about me is I’m not afraid to die on a treadmill. I will not be out-worked, period. You might have more talent than me, you might be smarter than me, you might be sexier than me, you might be all of those things — you got it on me in nine categories. But if we get on the treadmill together, there’s two things: You’re getting off first, or I’m going to die. It’s really that simple, right? You’re not going to out-work me. It’s such a simple, basic concept. The guy who is willing to hustle the most is going to be the guy that just gets that loose ball."
Changing your Luck and Succeeding in the Game of Life
Do acknowledge that the results you get from life are a direct reflection of your habitual thoughts, words and actions.
- Choose your own path and not the path laid out for you by others.
- Dedicate yourself to something worthwhile.
- Aim for daily growth and learn from experiences, from other people, and from mistakes.
- Taking advantage of opportunities to move your life forward in a better way.
- Take responsibility for your life, choices, decisions and actions without complaining, blaming or making excuses. (This empowers others- not you).
- Cultivate curiosity each and everyday.
- Ask yourself solution orientated questions about your life, problems and circumstances.
- Stay flexible in thought and open minded to other perspectives, ideas and opinions.
- Define your true core values, and boundaries.
- Keep true to your highest core values.
- Consider necessary short-term changes for long-term gains.
- Decisions, and responsibility is OK.
- Consistently raise your personal standards.
- Evaluate and change unhelpful thoughts, beliefs, habits and fears that are holding you back.
- Leave procrastination and instant gratification for others.
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